| New Journal(s, kinda) |
[15 Nov 2006|12:32am] |
Alright, I've found that writing dear journaly kind of stuff is a lot more fun in a private journal. So I've made one for that, and of course a new one for public important stuff, creative stuff, ranty stuff etc. You can add the new one at-
http://1deadfingernail.livejournal.com/
Please add me. Its public, but that way if you add me I never have to log into this account again. Thanks.
xoxo-Ryan
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| I got jumped last night |
[14 Oct 2006|12:56pm] |
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mood |
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 aggravated |
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Alright first yes I'm ok, I'm just getting lazier with telling the story so I figured I'd get it out here.
So I'm riding my bike home around midnight last night, and I'm cruising on Mt. Everest. I'm just grooving to some music and see 4 people walking on the left side of the street. I think something like "oh hey, 4 people!", and its kind of too late before I realize whats going on. They see me and scatter across the street and put on their menacing thug attitude. These bozos were pretty much exactly out of bottle rocket, a bunch of losers just trying to cause trouble, fucking me over much more than they're actually benefiting. The guy on the right throws me off the bike so I eat shit pretty hard. I'm immediately like man I don't have anything on me, I don't have anything. I take out my wallet to show him and give him the $2 I have, but by this point I'm on the ground and he's already taken my wallet and phone. The other guys snatch the bag that was on my bike that had my CD player with my nice headphones and my bike lock. Everest right near Balboa is a somewhat active street, so they bounce as soon as they can, and luckily they were either stupid enough / cool enough / it wasn't practical enough for them to take my bike.
The worst part is that its like... hey guys, my wallet has some shit in it with sentimental value, and I'm going to cancel my phone and debit card as soon as I get home, so can I give you like $10 and both of us can be better off? The headphones were the worst blow, and just the idea that I got jumped around the corner from my house. My knees fucking hurt.
Soo I currently do not have a phone, hopefully I'll get on getting a new one soon.
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[26 Jul 2006|02:20am] |
I'm suddenly sick and hurt everywhere and can't go to sleep... I'm just laying listening to the same album over and over hoping I'll drift off. But the internet beckons....
Last weekend and onward has been great. Saturday was our show at the Che, it was a blast. A lot of people I really like came and people danced and we were loud and there was fog and sweat. The other bands were also good and inspirational. Sunday followed in the footsteps of Saturday's goodness. I got into comicon for free and got to meet Maddox. Then went out to klantee with EJ and Curly and got blitzed / strunk with Ed Sr while he tried to impress us with old vynals and complained about divorce. Its sad that I bond so much more with my friend's parents. Monday I jammed with Garrett and we wrote some really good songs, then Jesse and I rode our bikes to EJs house and went swimming. Today I went to the Warhol Xzibit and was really impressed, then ate / played pingpong / swam into the first 2 hours of my work shift. I wish my memory went back further but I think I have a 4 day limit.
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[29 Jun 2006|10:04am] |
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mood |
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sappy and regretful |
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i've made a lot of mistakes in my life
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[16 Apr 2006|03:36am] |
Shit, I just had the weirdest, more surreal dream / nightmare I've had in a long time. I feel the need to write it down so I don't fall asleep and forget it, as if I could go back to sleep.
As far as nightmares go, it was pretty mild. But it definately had its own qualities that made it real (for a nightmare) and trippy. So like most dreams, it was the kind of thing where my surronding were constantly changing, going from hanging with my friends to being at school to being in a video game. But it was my ability to look backwards to stuff that happend earlier in my dream that made it so lifelike / surreal.
So the first thing I can remember is for whatever reason getting high with my friends at another college. I don't remember much about being high, but it was for sure the only kind of high you'd have in a dream. So I realize that I have to pee really bad, so I leave whatever room we're in make my way to the bathroom. Totally typical fucked up walking dream, I'm trying to make it to the bathroom across campus, and realize that everyone is staring at me because I'm walking so funny. It gets to the point where I can't even walk, and have to hop my way to the bathroom. Fucking typical.
So I finally make it there, and as I'm entering I'm kind of like hmmm this campus is extremely similar to Mesa's. At this point I become 100% aware that I now AM at Mesa. So I enter this large building, which I konw is the bathroom, but its SO much more. But I think I realize that later, for now I just walk up to a urinal to relive myself. But as I walk up the urinal changes into a trough like thing you'd see at the stadium. Except this one is different because it goes longways, is personal, and theres someone in front of me that I can see barely. Its also kind of high to reach, so here I am on my tippy toes, trying to properly urinate, and I'm just going out of control. I'm going like a fucking firehose, and a splash of piss actually flies out of the trough and onto the guy whos pissing in front of me. Immediately I realize that I just got my piss all over this huge 6'7'' giant of a man (who is played by the real life giant with an afro in my art class, which I'm only vaguely aware of at this point). So I start feeling extremely guilty and hoping he didn't realize, because he'd kick my ass, but not being able to stop peeing. So after an awkward moment, he finishes and appears standing next to me, totally staring me down (I'm done for). AT this point he completely puts on a school yard bully attitude (which deviates from his real lifeness), and starts giving me shit. At this point too I realize that whatever kind of bathroom I was in before, I'm now in this huge dining hall / rec area with bathroom facilities on the wall.
So here I am, peeing my guts out, not being able to stop, and this huge guy looming over me. Then he starts talking in this booming voice, clearly to the whole dining hall (which is packed), trying to embarass me. He's like: look at this fucking clown who can't even pee right! whats wrong buddy? it doesnt even look like you're drunk!!! In my head just screaming "I'm so highhh!!!" but realizing its wise to keep quiet. I just keep saying I'm so sorry dude I can't help it! And eventually after a ton of grilling / apolgizing he decides not to kick my ass and leaves disgruntled. At this point I make a HUGE mistake and turn to some people next to me and be like "sheesh that guy needs to relax!". Bad call. Immediately the guy rolls in because he TOTALLY heard me. He goes to take me out (I'm still peeing by the way :-/) but 3 or so guys of equal size deside to stick up for me and hold him back, which ends up resulted in a huge brawl outside the hall. So here I am finally done and wanted to help these amazing people who just saved me, but not wanting to be involved in a giant fight. So I start aimlessly wandering the campus, under the impression that I can't leave because the giant guy is waiting for me by my bike.
So here enters another phase of my dream in which things keep changing around. I'm walking around the campus and I happen to bump into Mike Sapp, who I stop because I just NEED to tell someone about what just happend... And here occurs one of the more interesting parts of the dream, something that I've never really experianced before. For whatever reason, I become CONVINCED that the day before I had a dream where something crazy happend to me, and I saw him on campus and told him about it. So A. I get this extreme de ja vu feeling, and B. I become completely convinced that whats happening now is real, because I'm able to talk about other dreams. After that nothing interesting happens and I decide its a good idea / safe to go home now.
Now something else very interesting happens, which is not typical for a dream, but I'm able to reflect on what happend to me earlier in the dream. It doesn't just morph around like everything else in the dream, and it gives it an extreme lifelike feeling. And of course the dream keeps changing, which makes thinking backwards fucking crazy, but I'll get to that later.
For now, I'm leaving campus trying to decide how to safely get to my bike. Luckily I see that the brawlers (still brawling of course) are away from the bike racks, so I'm safe. I saddle up and ride home. But weirdly by the time I get home its already dark, and decide to go immediately to bed. This is one of the weirder parts, where I'm trying to reflect and make sense of my day. I'm pondering if I should go inside and tell my family about the story, and then I start to question if it was even real or not. I think this sort of becoming consious about whats going on stemmed from my cell phone buzzing (someone called me while I was sleeping and my phone buzzes forever until I open it). So here I am having this surreal discussion in my head about rather or not what happend to me earlier was real or just a dream. And of course I'm still in the dream so I come to the conclusion that of course it was real, I wouldn't just make something like that up if I wasn't dreaming right? So I go to bed feeling somewhat defeated.
Now occurs another strange transition, and unfortunately I can't remember how it happend. But what I'm assuming is that I couldn't sleep so I decided to play some kind of game like counter strike or dota. In the game I become part of this team of 4, and realize immediately that we've killed all of the other team except one, who OF COURSE IS THE GIANT GUY FROM EARLIER. So I become intent on hunting him down and getting revenge, which our team eventually does. But then the dream morphs and the game becomes real, and here I am with 3 or so people in a warzone trying to look for shelter.
We find some sort of bomb bunker, and hide out in there and engage in conversation. They randomly ask me what kind of music I like, and I give the standard... lots... rock? And immediately one guy asks if I like Pavement, and of course I get excited and declare: they're like my favorite band, and the guy gives me this amazing smile as if to say he just found a new best friend. But at this point the conversation gets interuppted by us being attacked and shortly after I wake up.
FIN!
Waking up was crazy, putting it together in my head. That wasn't real? So I'm not gonna get my ass kicked when I go to Art on Tuesday? Awesome......
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[04 Apr 2006|01:18pm] |
YouTube is so interesting. I really wanted to watch the video for Lean wit it Rock wit it before school today, but all I could find are videos of people dressing up like the Franchise Boyz and dancing like them. I don't get why you'd ever do that, get a life.
In other news, my last few weeks have been awesome. My friends are great and need to be in San Diego more. Its lonely here sometimes. But absence makes the heart grow yonder I hear. Or absinthe. I need some more stoney partners.
Also don't forget to jot down April 21st on your calendars. Da Bears (cd release?) show!
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| Pi Day and shit! |
[15 Mar 2006|11:35pm] |
Pretty tight. A little too busy, didn't get to see as many people as I'd like or enjoy enough apple pie, but still had some high points. First off sorry if you didn't get my little card pic thing, Tom wasn't letting me post comments on like 50% of my friends, so at least know I tried.
Animal Collective was a really good time. I lost my crew pretty early on but was in my own little groove most of the show. They did a lot of new stuff that was amazing. I think they're dropping something new in 2006? So many lamers though... Almost half the people left halfway through, so readable. "THERE NOT PLAYING ANYTHING FROM THERE CDZZ!!!!!" This is what I fear if Godspeed ever tours again. Just stay home, please! Ruins the show for the fans who aren't there for hip pointz.
The show actually ended pretty early which was cool. I showed my devotion to Pi Day by going out with Jason and Danny for a little. I hope everyone else had a really good Pi Day!
Pi Bless,
Ryan
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[03 Mar 2006|06:44pm] |
I've been in a pretty damn good mood the past 2 days. I've been pretty boring lately, so the smallest bit of excitement is something to get excited about. I don't know how I keep from getting extremely lonely, but its good to know I've got amazing companions in all different places in the world.
Anyways, I just had a real moving and uplifting experience driving around, listening to the as-is new da bears, and some natures kids tracks ive recently done. Its fascinating to take a break from it for a week, and then see the things you've worked on for, in some ways, over a year, all come together for an hours worth of sonic pleasure.
Another weekend! Lets see if I can break the habit of just saying I'm actually going to do something. Give me a call!
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[01 Feb 2006|01:39am] |
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I want My Own Emily Haines. Make it happen MTV.
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[26 Jan 2006|01:35pm] |
Things have been pretty good I suppose. I've been really enjoying the latter part of my break, just taking it easy and sleeping in (amazing). Most of my spare time goes into the two albums I'm currently working on. Mostly the new Da Bears, which is taking foreverandever, but will be well well worth it, and secondly I'm working on a Nature's Kid full length that I'm taking slowwww and letting the music / ideas age.
In short its been an amazing break, I'll probably do some big break nostalgia post when part 3 ends. Until then later gators.
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| sooo.... |
[29 Dec 2005|05:41pm] |
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I might start updating again. Just to show off my new icon at least.
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[18 Dec 2005|08:01pm] |
Aww... I kind of miss writing in my livejournal. I have a feeling this last semester is getting flushed down the toilet of my memory. Fuck you alcohol.
edit: I didn't mean what I just said.
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| SHOW!! |
[28 Aug 2005|10:16pm] |
Seems like we made a lot of new friends. Because of how good we are...
PBpepper123: so...i was just wondering if your guitarists is seeing anyone?
projecTcpyrIghT: haha, he is sorry
PBpepper123: damn that sucks he is a cutie
jk
( And more )
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[18 Aug 2005|02:10am] |
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music |
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yanqui u.x.o. |
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Sometimes my phone randomly lights up with out buzzing or ringing. I just pretend that someone is thinking of me.
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| New Broken Social Scene: More Horns, More Canadians |
[04 Aug 2005|06:46pm] |
October 4th, 2005
Broken Social Scene
Broken Social Scene
1) Our Faces Split the Coast in Half
2) Ibi Dreams of Pavement (A Better Half)
3) 7/4 (Shoreline)
4) Finish Your Collapse and Stay for Breakfast
5) Major Label Debut
6) Fire Eye'd Boy
7) Windsurfing Nation
8) Swimmers
9) Hotel
10) Handjobs for the Holidays
11) Superconnected
12) Bandwitch
13) Tremoloa Debut
14) It's All Gonna Break
Meanwhile, the band is already a third of the way through another album slated for a spring release. "We are not going to over-think it too much," says Canning about the work-in-progress. "It's not going to be as great of a deconstruction process. The songs are bit more laid-back."
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[18 Jul 2005|02:11am] |
Morning: shit
Afternoon: bliss
Evening: shit
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| Canada, oh Canada |
[13 Jul 2005|11:33am] |
I just got back from Canada, it was so fucking tight. Broken Social Scene's first 3 songs were worth the trip I'd say. I'll scan my pictures later.
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| I'm right on the edge |
[01 Jul 2005|12:28pm] |
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music |
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silver mt. zion |
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Ugh, I hate dreams that affect my mood this late into the day. Its either that they're creepily depressing, or good enough so that waking up is a bummer. I think this is a mix of both.
I don't know what comes next.
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| Apostle of Hustle |
[17 Jun 2005|11:30am] |
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music |
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The Microphones |
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Saw Apostle of Hustle last night at The Echo. Totally awesome. There were no more than 40 people there? In this small swanky lounge. I was stoked because EJ really liked them too. Thanks to Jill for the freeeeeee tickets. I just hope all summer all my updates are about amazing shows I go to.
Speaking of amazing shows, let me take this opportunity to announce:
Da Bears!
Playing at Soma
July 1st - 7:00 - $7
It would mean a lot to me if you went. We play first so go kinda early.
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| Stephen Malkmus & The Jicks |
[15 Jun 2005|12:43pm] |
I would assume it goes without saying that Malkmus was absolutely amazing last night, but then I thought twice. After seeing him at All Tomorrow's Parties last year, I had a few reservations. It was a good set, but good is far from absolutely amazing. Noting the changes between last years performance and this show (outdoor festival -> indoor club, playing at 1:00 -> headlining, being far back -> potentially being front row), my hopes still managed to get pretty high, and they were still blown away.
( Story time kids... )
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[07 Jun 2005|08:48pm] |
Being done with school is pretty nice. I don't have to feel guilty about watching both episodes of the Daily Show, my meals get shifted 3 hours later, and the only thing I have to worry about is finding reading material to keep me occupied during work. And EJ comes home in 5 days.
This weekend was pretty good. Lauren Bailey was in town so I hung out with her, and reunited Jesse with casual drinking. Its actually pretty sad that I'm still sore from the football that was played on Saturday.
One week!
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| I just wanna type a lot |
[23 May 2005|11:06am] |
So I saw WHY? and Restiform Bodies at the che last night and it was absolutely amazing. The whole atmosphere was so great. You know you're at a good show when you're at the che and you can look around and not see a single hipster / fasioncore / poseur who put way too much time into dressing for a show. When we got there someone was turntableing and it was pretty impressive. The whole room area was awesome, every band had their equipment scattered through the room. Just a mess of keyboards / samplers / processors everywhere with the guitars and shit on the stage. After the guy was done scratching this 3 piece jazzy jam band started. It was just a drummer, a stand up bass with oodles of effects, and a turntableist. They were all really good, but didn't have any direction. Next some guy got on his laptop and started looking beats and keyboards over himself. Good chilling vibe. Finally Restiform Bodies started getting ready. Prior to this everyone was sitting but they crammed everyone in standing up. These guys fucking rocked. 3 guys on keyboards, one doing drum stuff, one controlling beats, then one guy mostly rapping and doing some keyboards. So good. But once WHY? started I was blown away.
These guys are fucking amazing. They consist of a drummer, and the main singer and 2 other guys who alternate between bass, guitars, and the rhodes. Best pop music ever. It was like 4 amazing musicians put through a brilliance filter. The lyrics bordered so closely between brilliant and cheesy. Mixing speak / singish with shaky melodies. The drummer confused me because 1) I could hear what he was playing, 2) He clearly looked human. I've seen some god damn good drummers before, but no one whos played so furiously and with such passion! I mean, for a song he played bass while playing the kick drum and hi hat with his feet. What the fuck? The other 2 guys were amazing too, just such a good mix of textures and back up vocals. We didn't get home til 1 but it was soo worth it.
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| Block Party |
[14 May 2005|11:13pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
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music |
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im still your fag |
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God damn I'm drained from today.
Last night Garrett and I drove down and got ourselves a nice little parking spot for my van. Damn good idea cause we kind of had a "homebase" where we could hang and store stuff. So this morning around 12 Garrett's mom takes Garrett, Danny, Melina, and me down to about the boardwalk. We walked a few blocks to my van and got our drink on. After drinking for a while we went to Filipis where Stephanie was working. It was pretty rad, we got in, got a table, and pizza within 15 minutes. I took advantage of the ridiculous situation by taking shots in-between slices. So surreal. At this point Garrett was insanely drunk and blissfull. We visited Casey at Buffalo Exchange and then saw some kids who come to our work. We finally made our way back to the van and got my hair played with for like an hour (highlight of day). Eventually Matt and Jesse showed up and we did the van chilling thing for a bit more. I actually don't know what the hell we did. At one point we were riding skateboards on our bellies in Ralphs, that was amazing. Some other kids were skating around too, soo good. We went to 711, visited Casey again, then saw Donald, Frank, and Jesse. That was awkward. After sobering up I convinced everyone to go jacuzzing at the hotel on the bay. That was a good time, after hopping the fences we waited until spots opened up in the jacuzzi and jumped in. There was a young couple quizzing us on almost all aspects of our life, Matt did a good job of thinking of good lies. Then the two older women started talking to us about the marriage conference they were going to (?). Garrett was still pretty drunk and mocking them and was making me laugh way too much, and Danny was asking extremely awkward questions. Garrett and I had to leave but we eventually all met up again, went to Robertos. Always such an odd day, but glad everyone had a good time.
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[10 May 2005|08:31pm] |
Mmmmm so I'm really stressed right now. Final work on my new / garage room is being done, so I'm kind of roomless right now. I'm excited for it to be done but theres something about sleeping on the couch, not having any private space, and not having my computer set up thats slowly taxing on me. And I'm kind of stressed about prom. Its not even my prom! I guess I just have prom anxiety because mine sucked, kind of. AND band drama. asdfsdfwefwaef
On a positive note, I'm about to watch Life Aquatic right now. And this weekend should be fun with a group watching, and then block party. Call me if you're going peoplesss.
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[02 May 2005|10:09pm] |
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music |
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hidden cameras |
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There will be a castration fear if practice is flaked again!
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